When you avoid difficult feelings and emotions, they tend to find ways to let you know they’re still there.

Have you experienced this? I know there have been times I have tried to push away feelings of anger, sadness or frustration because dealing with them seemed like it would be too big or too much work - or I didn’t want to face them. However, what tended to happen was those unprocessed feelings of anger, sadness or frustration would seep out in unexpected places: like getting annoyed with other people’s driving or at my dog for wanting sniff at a very smelly and wonderful fire hydrant instead of focusing on our full-steam ahead walk. The issue wasn’t about my dog or the other drivers - they were receptacles for my misplaced anger, grief and frustration.

When this happens, recognizing that there is something that you need to process is a great first step. Even if you choose not to immediately address it, acknowledging there is something there takes the pressure off your parts who are holding that grief or frustration to know that they are seen. And then, when it works for you, find the time and space to figure out and process your feelings.

Try and be kind to yourself during all of this processing. Working through difficult feelings and emotions is hard. Having self-awareness about your feelings is a big part of moving forward.